(00:02) we have been duped by feminism sexual Liberation and anti-depressants we have been told that we are powerful and free now as women but we feel tired wired and bitter we’re mostly eating right exercising and meditating wrangling to-do lists and arranging playdates and yet there’s a haunting holess beneath the huge complaint what if I told you that there is a huge Storehouse a reservoir of energy inside of you that has not been tapped that you could feel light and pulsing excited and alive in ways that a wellness lifestyle
(00:49) cannot deliver that you could trust yourself that the world could feel safe and that unexpected and expected Delights could start to illuminate your path no coach therapist doctor or Guru required just you learning to get real present and attentive with you I feel like I’m here to matchmake your inner parts for the greatest love affair ever written I want to help you learn first where you’re buying eggs from the hardware store which is the source of all pain I want to help you master entering through the upset which is the
(01:27) only spiritual practice You’ll Ever Need and to get real comfortable putting on your villain Crown which is in my opinion the key to True power and then you’ll attune to your inner yes so you can live the life defined by the specific pleasure of who you are I am so excited to announce my latest book called The reclaimed woman which is available for pre-order now so if you head to the link in show notes you can learn more about bonuses events and companion offerings and I cannot wait to see your gorgeous face on the
(02:07) [Music] path I’m Dr Kelly Brogan you may know me as a New York Times bestselling author of a book with an exploding pill on the cover Renegade psychiatrist P dancer or honorary member of the disinformation doesn’t what can I say I’m a born provocator I’ve spent most of my recent life exposing deceptions connecting dots and discovering the secret places my inner victim is still waiting to be liberated and now I feel called to help you reclaim all of your parts your health your sexuality your power and your expression so that you can finally
(02:46) truly own yourself I want to ignite in you that inner knowing and the pulsing Vitality that lives beneath your disempowerment disconnection and resentment so that you can audaciously courageously and playfully alchemize your struggle into the specific pleasure of who you are this is Reclamation radio a soulfire production the following is a live stream recording that I shared about my calm body clear mind Workshop where I consolidate simple lifestyle hacks that allow you to taste what it is to reclaim your power of choice and change your
(03:25) story you can learn more at Kelly Brogan md.com Dash body and at the linkoln show notes I have described the most important relationship that you will ever have as being the one that you have with your body it’s not just like your body that you can touch I think it’s the experience of having chosen if you believe this to Incarnate literally the whole mysterious experience that we opted in for of being in a body and what that entails and it entails experience es that can look like what we call symptoms and look like unexpected
(04:07) potential adversity that I’m going to talk about how it is that we’re set up to be at war with the body and what it is to heal this relationship what it is it’s the same thing as it is to heal every other relationship in your life including with the government including with your husband including with your annoying cat whatever it’s the same thing it’s moving from a consciousness of fear and control into one of trust and curiosity and there are ways that we can begin to expand into the it’s whole of fractal
(04:39) right so as one relationship is so others will be right so you can expand the field of your trust and curiosity based relationships so much more easily when you have this Foundation I actually think in the Reclamation of your relationship to your body to the experience of symptoms to the experience of what you’re calling Health right so health is not just not being dead health is not just the absence of disease and illness health is for many of us in this more holistic space it’s a process of self-discovery it’s like you are walking
(05:14) yourself home to you you are remembering who it is that you’ve always been and again if this may be part of your belief system perhaps we chose to forget so we can have the Delight of remembering I often reference this Alan Watts lecture where he talks about what it would be like if we could be in charge of our dreams so the first night you have all the incredible sex and the second night you go on this wild adventure and the third night you eat all the amazing food and then by the seventh night you’re like you know what you make it up
(05:45) somebody else make it up because it’s so much more delightful when we have that element of surprise and I would add that Alchemy is what’s on deck for all of us right now and that this experience of being able to turn mud into Lotus into goal to be able to access within this vessel of a body what it is to turn what we are hurting over what we are hating about into what Delights us into what feels expansive and free and even pleasurable that’s what we came here for so the experience of healing this relationship you may know that I like to
(06:23) think a lot about life in the world in terms of polarity so masculine feminine polarity you could call it yin-yang what ever I like gender terms so I think about the experience of exercising commitment and focused attention as being fundamentally masculine traits let’s say masculine behaviors so a lot of what we do when we make the choice to reclaim our health right I know what it takes and I know how powerfully expansive it is to heal this relationship to the masculine and maybe a better word is mature it so when you
(07:05) are maturing your relationship to your masculine what you’re doing is you are lovingly working with commitment follow through and you are honoring the impulse the more we do that in every dimension of our life and we’ve been taught and I’ll talk about why not to do that we’ve been taught that our impulses are not to be trusted so the undoing of that is to begin to trust your impulse so you trusted the impulse to be here that was your Healthy mature masculine holding space for your feminine you engage in these kinds of
(07:43) Lifestyle commitments and most importantly because the greatest gift of the masculine in all of us is attention where we put our attention that’s the masculine power so when you focus you’re choosing right to focus your attention somewhere you’re honoring the impulse that said look at me look over here pay attention here and so when you begin to exercise your power to commit to follow through and to really mature your masculine competence it starts with honoring the small yes that Whisper of a there’s something here and most of the folks
(08:26) that you can see on our outcomes page they knew long before they actually engaged in health Reclamation they knew already what they had to do right they knew that there was a big step and then it was just waiting for the Readiness this very ephemeral Force which is the Readiness and I often say that you’re ready when moving in the direction of change feels like relief that the relief feels more powerful than any sort of fear associated with the movement towards the unknown so a lot of the yes that you’re holding space for but probably you don’t
(09:09) really have a good sense what you want in your life you know what you don’t want that’s normally where we start like I don’t like the job I don’t like the relationship I’m sick of this house my car sucks we are so habituated to our know that actually we begin to live off of the small sort of Thrills of that repeated pattern of encountering disappointment and resentment and frustration so we don’t ever really get to explore our yes because we haven’t created that safe container that safe space to honor that little yes that is
(09:49) beneath all of that big pile of no and this I think actually stems from some pretty Cardinal Dynamics for all of us there is a psychiatrist I often reference Alexander Lo who wrote a book called fear of life and I do think that’s what we’re dealing with we think we’re afraid of death and actually we’re afraid of life we’re afraid of living and for good reason not just because like oh what if I’m so beautiful and wealthy and popular and well I will know what to do with that yes and it’s deeper because early in our childhoods through
(10:20) seemingly mundane but very Insidious sort of sociocultural conditioning we are pit against our vital force I like to call it our EOS we are pit against this we are put at war with our own life force energy whether you think this was done systematically intentionally and you’re some kind of crazy conspiracy theorist or it’s just the nature of The Human Experience and parenting and family Dynamics it doesn’t matter because you know whether it’s being told when you know you should eat and being told how much you should eat
(10:59) whe whether it’s food being used as rewards whether it’s the fact that you have to raise your hand to go peeee as a 5-year-old and you don’t get to just learn when it’s time for you to go PP all of these sort of daily Dynamics and then you pile on of course doctor’s visits and physical exams and birth and all of the ways that we are channeled and funneled into a system that says you don’t know best somebody else does and don’t trust yourself you’re not an expert on you there’s another expert you can consult on you and of course then
(11:33) there’s the role of our relationship to our sexuality and how most of us grew up in households where it was not to be spoken of or it was not allowed or we were punished and shamed for any emergent elements of our own Sexual Energy this is how I would all of us are set up for this Warfare Consciousness and this Warfare Consciousness I often call victim cons Consciousness and victim Consciousness has a lot of Hallmarks the languaging of victim Consciousness is the easiest way to spot it because there is can be like
(12:10) it whispering in your own mind or it’s the way you speak to your friends or talk to others I sometimes call it commiseration connection this habit of complaining but the language will often include I can’t I have to and you can and you don’t have to that’s the truth but we get so in this pattern of understanding ourselves to be imprisoned you could go so far as to say enslaved that we don’t know that we are the ones who have the keys I mean it sounds so cliche and it’s actually true I’ve witnessed it hundreds and hundreds
(12:48) and hundreds of times I’ve experienced it myself you have the key you’ve always had the key and you are even from childhood when we chose to meaning make about our traumas in a certain way of course we had good reason to choose that way to say I am I must be a bad person because my uncle did this thing to me right there are strategic ways that we because of our like dependency and helplessness as children that we choose to survive we choose to narrate and there is no process of initiating any of us into adult
(13:23) Consciousness and the Reclamation of our power that honestly we’ve always had as Divine beings and somehow we end up walking around adults in essentially big girl clothes and we still are dealing with the same psychology That Never Was matured from earlier in our lives so this kind of like no fair why me I hate this you know if you’re more colorful speaker like me it’ll be like this that’s often what Rings through me but then it’s this subtle sense that something is wrong with you I’ve Been Told by most of the patients that I have
(14:02) facilitated Health Reclamation with alongside and through that what I offered them was simply the permission to no longer believe that there’s something wrong with them and I work with this every day I have the impulse for example in my personal life I have the impulse to move like I want to move houses and I live in a beautiful house and I left my best girlfriend a message last night and I said I’m really feeling the part of me that thinks that something is wrong with me like what is wrong with me that I would
(14:36) choose to move out of this house everything is okay my animals are happy I have what I need why would I move am I just that up that I would just create drama and create challenges for myself what’s wrong with me and so I can still to this day 14 or so years after initiating myself through my own protocol and resolving my autoimmune condition I can still to this day meet that part of me that feels like wow I’m really damaged Beyond repair and honestly the only difference is that now it’s just a part of me it’s not the
(15:10) Mantra of my life it’s not the narrative that I am living through and with and I do think that when I look over the course of my I like to call it a becoming because Awakening is very precious and self-important I feel like and individuation process is a little psychological so I like to think of myself as becoming is that I’m necessarily becoming better and that’s a very tricky trap to fall into so I’m just becoming over these years I’m just becoming and if you watch the videos in the calm body Workshop you can see that
(15:47) it’s me but also so different it’s so different and when I think about what is different the chief defining feature of that shift is anxiety it’s the discomfort of being 15 years ago I was so uncomfortable being in my skin all the time and whether I was dealing with illness or symptoms or just making my way to a meeting I was anxious I was afraid it’s like you’re sweating and The Mask might slip off any moment so there’s all these Vigilant but UNC conscious defenses and all these things that we do that end up hurting
(16:32) ourselves and other people because we don’t know that we have a choice and I often say you don’t actually have a choice until you know that you do and over these years I have actually engaged in a practice of laughing at my Ridiculousness and meeting new aspects of my shameful self and being able to be like yeah wow cool that’s there now too you know what I did this really shitty thing the other day and I want to apologize for it this kind of experience of just I’m here I’m here I’m just here for an experience coming into this body
(17:06) I have all of these aspects of myself they’re all here the good and the bad it’s all here you know what are you about so part of what is reclaimed as that experience of existential anxiety begins to transform over this process the ritual initiation to this journey was and is and I am a passionate believer that it is the lifestyle Reclamation so when I said you don’t have a choice until you know that you do the way that you do in my very biased experience is that you engage in something like vital mind reset or a
(17:45) similar protocol where you enter into a field of personal responsibility where victim Consciousness cannot go unnoticed by you or anyone else in the community and You Begin to exercise mature and really devote that masculine energy of attention follow through and commitment so that you can begin to grow the container for this becoming for your expression and then you forever more I have a choice I have a choice about what to eat for breakfast I have a choice about what kind of water to drink I have a choice about what time to go to bed I have a
(18:29) choice about how I’m going to interact with the objective toxicity that we have generated as humans on this plane I have a choice about the first thing that I do in the morning and I have a choice about what story I’m going to tell about my life I have a choice about how I’m going to speak and then you have choices about how you’re going to interact with the space that you’re walking the choices just it’s like an accordion they just open up and that level of empowerment I think we all imagine we want but we probably aren’t ready to actually step
(19:02) into until we are and that’s why I’m a big believer in starting with a ritualized Reclamation of lifestyle choices before you start assessing the health of all of the relationships in your life and what is your purpose and are you living your Dharma how about you just get right with your lifestyle choices how about you just get right with your body how about you just start to care and really turn your attention towards yourself I’m a big believer in sacred selfishness I think it’s one of the truisms of the human experience which is that every
(19:37) single thing we do we do for ourselves to meet our own needs and when we are pretending otherwise oh my God it is a torture chamber of very draining Dynamics so part of really resolving that gas light that you’re doing anything in your life for anybody other than yourself is actually do something for yourself to actually say you know what for a month of my life this is what my attention is going to be on me on me on everything that matters to me beginning with the I call it the chopping wood carrying water so before I open up to questions I
(20:20) and I believe there are many I hope to get to a lot of them because you can see I like to chitty chat so I will do my best to get through as many as I can I want to just briefly tell you my story in case you don’t know it and this narrative and this story is just a story so it’s just the story I like to tell about my experience and maybe that story will change in the future but you may know that I am totally conventionally trained so I come from my mom is Italian and I Am Second Generation and anyone who has immigrant
(20:57) parents knows that there is a lot of power that is vested in the system so I basically had to get straight A and I had to go to a good school and I had to get a lucrative job not an artsy job a real job like a lawyer or a doctor whatever so I studied at MIT as you do and I worked a suicide hotline there like fate would have it I don’t know why I chose to do that who does that in their spare time but did and I probably like the thrill of it I guess and so I worked the suicide hotline and I was supervised by psychiatrists and that was
(21:37) the first time that I encountered the intensity of my discomfort with human suffering like how much I needed human suffering to go away and so I saw okay wow Psychiatry has this figured out they’ve cracked the code they have the solutions and all you need to do is connect these people who are really struggling with psychiatrists and then everyone feels better so I actually went on to become a psychiatrist for that reason because I felt more in control I felt Less in contact with my own discomfort my discomfort about other people’s
(22:13) discomfort and it worked out well for a while I would say it wasn’t until I was specializing at the fellowship level in prescribing all manner of psychiatric medications to pregnant and breastfeeding women that was actually my specialty I was one of the first 300 in the world to specialize in reproductive Psychiatry which became necessary as a specialization in Psychiatry because one in Four Women of reproductive age at the time I imagine it may even be more now were entering pregnancy on an anti-depressant or a sleep Med or an
(22:48) anti-anxiety Med or mood stabilizer these terms and titles and when I was specializing I actually was pregnant with my first and I remember having this feeling as I was writing a prescription to a pregnant woman that I would never take this medication and here I am sitting there telling her about the 25,000 cases in the literature and how there’s not really a signal of teratogenicity and it’s relatively safe and your depression is so much more dangerous so it’s probably a great idea to just continue your medication everything’s going to be
(23:21) fine and I’m thinking I would never take this I don’t care what you say that is called cognitive dissonance so when something in your lived experience does not fit with the held beliefs that are pre-existing so you have a lot of choices at that point I suppressed that was the choice that I made I suppressed that awareness and it didn’t come back into my field until 10 months postpartum when I was diagnosed with an autoimmune condition I’m sure many of you are familiar with called Hashimoto thyroiditis and I was diagnosed with
(23:55) Hashimoto with some run-of-the-mill symptoms like a lot of forgetfulness I had really swung with my weight I lost a ton of weight really quickly and I thought that was great and then I was like having edema puffiness having hair loss and the diagnosis was rendered on a routine physical so I don’t even know because it’s all like Mom stuff new mom stuff like oh everything’s fine it’s new mom stuff so it was a routine physical I was diagnosed and I decided that the last thing I wanted to do was walk my little prescription over to CVS once a
(24:30) month for the rest of my life I was not interested in that life so was honestly some degree of laziness you could say it was some faded experience who knows and I went to an naturopath I changed my diet in many of the ways that I now have protocolized in vital mind reset and it was less than a year that I watched in black and white on paper the resolution and remission of my diagnosis and moreover I felt like a completely different person now I was not really sick I was still functioning but there were all of like constipation or a
(25:10) little brain fog and my energy was all over the place and I was just chronically wound up person and I began to shift in the space of that first year and that was the beginning of the rest of my life and that’s why when you take the wheel and you do so so in a field of belief that says this is for me I want this and you can almost taste what’s on the other side which for me was freedom from this system that ironically I was a part of of course I wanted to free myself from it I didn’t know that at the time then the rest of your Journey
(25:48) Begins so it was from that point that I went through the big NO phase so I’m a big believer that no comes first then yes so I the big NO phase was like a no to all of my training a no to all Pharmaceuticals like a no to the whole system I wrote a book with an exploding pill on the cover and it was many years of really sounding the alarm on what it is that we aren’t told about conventional medications and the allopathic approach to chronic illness specifically and from that place I began to make contact with my yes and actually
(26:26) the first the pivot the switch point that was actually when my mentor Dr Nicholas Gonzalez who has Anointed The protocol and actually it’s his detoxification approach his approach to coff Animas that is housed in vitaline reset only it’s not in my books it’s not anywhere else and that is to honor his legacy when he died in 2015 I went through yet another dark KN of the soul and I decided I’m going to transition my career into one that feels good and at the time I had been mostly focused on fighting against the system my practice
(27:09) was built on medication tapers helping women to come off of medication and I wanted to feel better every day and so I decided to start celebrating outcomes and that’s when I started to publish case reports case series did a randomized control trial of vitaline reset and I made a sport made a game out of Dogma defying outcomes like did you know that you could put Graves disease or lupus or migraines or asthma or IBS or even schizophrenia or bipolar all of these labels into lasting remission did you know that that’s possible and that is
(27:49) when I began to focus my my work on what is possible because I figure if you know what’s possible then your nent feminine that little yes inside of you that little I want that inside of you can come online and if you’re masculine is mature enough you can make the right choice for that feminine impulse and you can follow through on it and you can expand into this new layer of your becoming you can have a deeper experience of ESS in your own skin and you can begin to encounter moments of delight in your life which are I think
(28:30) often present themselves when adversity is alchemized into pleasure I’ve told the folks in vital life project my membership about this but the other day I and I imagine some of you were at fit for service but I was coming back from Aubrey Marcus’s event with his amazing community at fit for service and I had a great experience there and my ranting and raving was very well-received and I get to the airport and I’m feeling really okay which for me is like the Holy Grail I don’t always even at this point still trust when I feel happy I
(29:07) want to feel just deep okayness like I belong here like I literally belong here on this plane so I’m feeling really okay and I’m like I want to make a list of something I’m not really a big gratitud list kind of girl I don’t know it’s just never been in practice that’s stuck for me however I sat down and I right at the top the title of this list I’m going to make and it’s like things that are going well but then I am a believer in the maybe principle which is like the things that go well sometimes are really
(29:37) challenging afterward and the things that are really challenging often are the best things so what does that mean what do I know whether it’s well or not well so I changed it to things that went delightfully today and my list was not like oh I got a standing ovation at the talk it was so great my hair turned out okay yay it was like I lost my wallet and then I found it right like my suitcase didn’t fit anywhere on the airplane and then a guy moved his stuff a little bit and it fit right over my seat so it’s these little
(30:12) examples and of course they’re the big ones like how and why my mentor’s death was one of the most pivotal elements of my becoming how could that be right I lost the most benevolent Father Figure I’ve known in this lifetime and how could that ever be something other than terrible right so the Delight of that is part of what then we begin to experience regularly because you relate to adversity differently so when you get a fever or a cough or you begin to struggle with sleeping or whatever every little thing that happens in your
(30:50) healthscape and then when your relationship begins to deteriorate or you encounter a parenting challenge you have this now wellestablished habit of turning towards it with curiosity because you’ve evolved and transformed that impulse that otherwise would be there to control to submit it this is the immature masculine it’s like do what I say it’s the abusive energy of do what I say because I can’t handle otherwise there’s a different way for you to relate to yourself and I have absolutely related to myself that way with my
(31:27) health even when I was in the developing of this protocol in fact I re-recorded all the videos at the beginning of plandemic 3 years ago all 44 days because I felt like you know what my energy has shifted and this can be lighter I want to have an experience of so many of us doing this because we want to because it’s the most interesting adventure to see what happens when you change these variables in your life and the unexpected emerges because you’re ready for the unexpected what is the story that you’ve been telling like I have this or I’m
(32:09) sick or I’m poor it doesn’t have to be a about health because it’s full of fractal it’s all connected I’m destined to be alone like nothing’s going to help me what is the story that you are really tired of it’s not actually the defining feature of yourself Hood it’s a story and I am living proof that you can change that story and actually becomes fun to change the story over time but the first big story you change is scary as hell and that’s why I believe this should only happen in like-minded community with people who share this
(32:50) commitment to resolving and transforming victim Consciousness so we’re not going to cuddle you we’re not going to do that we’re not not going to like oh so sorry you this is about I see you and let’s see where else we can go together because really only you know you know what is the next step to take and that impulse is what we’re here to begin to strengthen a relationship to so with that I would love to open to questions is VMR possible when going through anti-depressant withdrawal okay so I’m just going to give a
(33:30) nutshell about the whole medication thing because that is so remember this is the protocol that I used to resolve I mean now it’s literally been over a decade I have never taken thyroid hormone since and I did when I was first diagnosed so this is what I used to resolve my now I’ll say so-called because I have all sorts of queries into what autoimmune illness even is however to resolve my autoimmune condition it is the same protocol that I then took into my private practice because I had dedicated my practice to helping women come off of
(34:04) meds and it was a nightmare in Nightmare and then when I said well I see what this these changes did for me so let me see if it makes their tapers easier so now and you this is all in the program so you don’t have to remember any of this but just so you’ve heard it if you are thinking about coming off actually any medication but if you’re thinking the hardest ones to come off of or the psychiatric ones so if you’re thinking about coming off a medication you do not touch it you don’t come off it before or during the
(34:36) protocol you do the protocol first so it’s like setting up the room for the experience that’s what happens first if you have already begun a taper and it’s challenging or let’s say it’s even going all right those of us who have come off of medications know that it’s the months after the last dose that can be the most challenging so you will definitely still benefit from introducing VMR mid taper you just wouldn’t taper during that month which honestly that’s a fine Pace anyway it’s similar with panic attacks
(35:12) is similar right the anxiety about the anxiety can also become like it almost takes on a life of its own and becomes this meta compounded challenge right you’re trapped between this intervention that on some level you know is not a destination right it’s either the benefits so-called are not going to be sustainable probably and that’s what the literature suggests or it’s just going to not feel good over time to be using this intervention so you’re tra between that and the fact that you hate I’ll just use that word for dramatic
(35:49) flare what’s happening to you right this anxiety the insomnia this feeling of as I was saying maybe I could summarize discomfort in your own skin yeah I bet come 900 PM you’re like I could I trade with somebody else please like could I be in another self and that trap is what needs to be alchemized that trap is what needs to be transformed and it’s not like you’re just going to be freed from the trap like there’s some magic pill if there were a magic pill you wouldn’t be asking me this question because you’re
(36:25) already on it right unfortunately or fortunately there’s not and that’s because we want to I think I believe we want to go on this journey of discovering what was the message of this insomnia what is it really about is it something with my blood sugar right which would suggest that it’s just a simple tweak to my diet a simple but regimented and consistent tweak to my diet is going to resolve that and then my body’s going to say thank you and I’m gonna sleep like a baby right or is it something in the pattern of my stimulus
(36:58) and stress over the course of the day is it something in my routine is it that I’m not capturing this magical 900 p.m if you’re in the workshop you know I’m very passionate about 9:00 p.m bedtime at least for a period of time I’ve been doing it since 2015 but at least for a period of time in your life just so you see so we’re learning the dialect of our symptoms you have to learn what you’re trying to tell you because your symptoms are you telling you about you and what we are conditioned to believe is this
(37:27) horrible thing is happening it has to stop for me to be okay I totally get that I get it and that’s why my answer to probably all these questions is going to be I don’t mind reset just do it literally because the conditions that you must control in order to send that signal of safety to your nervous system so that all these little kinks and nose in your body meaning your body is saying no this is not working they start to relax and then you can start to explore I don’t know if you drink coffee or whatever then you
(38:02) can reintroduce something and oh wow there’s that anxiety whoa It’s back okay now I know it’s that thing right so this is a classic Elimination Diet sort of thing and it’s a really effective way to begin to decode a language even though it’s you telling you about you it’s still a language and from that place you will have reconnected with yourself so your first response to yourself is not the sucks I don’t like this go away stop because that’s how you’re talking to yourself and that’s how we all do that’s how we all talk to ourselves when we are
(38:36) experiencing symptoms I wouldn’t focus on the meds piece because that will be it’s like people ask me too about smoking cigarettes like all that stuff once these foundational needs are met they’re so much easier to just peel away so you’re not doing this to get off the MS you might do this if you choose to I would love that cuz I’ll remember this conversation is just the greatest Delight of my life so see over and over and over again that these shifts are possible and they don’t take long they really don’t I mean the people having
(39:07) experien this in the workshop saw that in days so I do think that part of what I want you to come away from this little chitty chat with is just the possibility that there’s actually nothing wrong here I know that sounds weird because insomnia can make a same person crazy literally trust me I have a lot of experience with insomnia my practice Almost 100% of my patients dealt with insomnia at some point sometimes for months on end sometimes very severe it can be the greatest initiation to yourself so if you can start to reframe
(39:39) your experiences like oh wow this is where the Reclamation of my power begins you know you’ll see this is it’s real and it’s it’s not just like your anxiety’s gone your insomnia is better when you go through it and you Unite with your experience there’s all sorts of I don’t know layers of your life that begin to to shift and so that’s how big a deal this is and it’s not to suggest that what you’re dealing with is not maybe in moments like pushing you to the brink because I know firsthand and also through through my patients what
(40:20) that can be like I mean that’s a big one of the most regrettable things I did was sleep train my kids because I just didn’t know better I guess when you know better you do better there’s ‘s no such thing as hyper sensitivity because your sensitivity is always rightful your body is always interpreting according to the psychobiological term is your neuroception so how are you perceiving safety or danger in the world and there could be like a pile of laundry right on a chair in your room and you can literally be cowering under
(40:54) your bed with a gun thinking that it’s an invader you know Intruder or some sort of perpetrator or you could see it as a pile of laundry so reclaiming our neuroception which is to say that loud noise actually isn’t dangerous to me or for me weirdly I don’t like wind and fans it’s like does something to my system that is really uncomfortable that my system registers as problematic why right part of that vigilance was a wise response right so that vigilance has served at some point in certain environments in certain contexts so part
(41:32) of how we catch all of the dimensions of ourselves up to the here and now and to find more ease that’s available to claim that ease is this foundational nervous system healing it’s like we know because of Peter lavine’s work and Stephen pes’s work we know that there are different patterns of stress physiology right so so as we adapted in our early trauma based experiences as we adapted we recruited fight flight freeze often we add in fawning which is appeasement like coerced appeasement almost and it served us the way that you can begin to
(42:16) exercise choice in those responses or at least awareness in those responses it starts with this foundational healing and so while there’s so much beautiful somatic work that can be done I’m imagining some of you are even somatic experiencing practitioners or different kinds of somatic therapists for me that comes after like now I do somatic experiencing work to help me with things like my startle reflex if my girls come in the room and they don’t announce that they’re walking in the room like I’m on the ceiling with my cat for me first
(42:48) comes a lifestyle protocol first comes that found and in fact sometimes I look at these people in the sematic experiencing world and I’m like have you ever done something like V because it might be a lot more accessible to you to expand your capacity because that’s what this is about right like your nervous system capacity for what is challenging frustrating triggering scary because why you have the discernment you’re not in fight flight or freeze you can see that it’s a pile of laundry right you can perceive accurately I mean not to get
(43:23) into like sociopolitical Realms but this is so much of what happens in the activism space is that we see Boogeyman all the time all around us I mean it’s really the same as germ Theory like we see this scary stuff all around us but if you look around the room you’re in like everything’s actually fine right so we start to live in a scary reality a dangerous reality and of course vigilance is you need vigilance in that reality but when you can sort of reel it back in you can make contact with your body’s signals you can start to like
(43:57) monit monor them like what actually is happening in my body body what do you need in this moment then everything can become more grounded in here and now and fundamentally typically safer but I think that comes later I mean for me it was like a decade later actually that I started that work like I needed to heal my adrenals I needed to heal my endocrine system like I needed to allow my gut to be functioning in a healthy way for years before I got into the nuances and that’s not to say like you’re going to be like struggling and
(44:25) suffering in this like quasy ADH land unmedicated ADHD land or anything like that it’s just to say that if you can shift your perspective to say my body is still wisely responding the more signals of safety I can send the better and the sooner my capacity to really assess whether something is dangerous or not will grow and a lot of that you know I think does begin with this sort I call it like a 360 signal of safety so that’s why in in VMR there is there’s a detox pillar right which again comes from my mentor
(45:00) and then conscious consumerism what kind of stuff to buy you know like what kind of laundry detergent Etc and then there is contemplative practice and I was never a meditator never until I for many karmic reasons ended up in a Kundalini yoga training and I fell in love with that form of meditation why because you get a quick hit because you feel it quickly so the meditations called medical meditations in this protocol are three minutes long that’s it that’s all you do three minutes every day so it’s not like 20 minutes watching your
(45:33) thoughts I still find that challenging and then of course it’s very specific but not super unique nutritional protocol and the combination of those three things plus a field a community of people who are no longer investing energy Prana Louch into their victim stories which even in spiritual communities I’m sure you’ve seen this like there is a lot of when it comes to Health in the body there’s a lot of like oh you know that that’s tough like I guess you need to do that medication thing doctor thing emergency thing right
(46:12) so and I get it like I have I happen to be a doctor so I have an advantage right like I have a stronger I guess like capacity to Not freak out in the face of these things I don’t know what it is but I I do know that it’s the the field of belief is very specific and the way that we encourage people to speak as your words are spells this is all how again you send that signal of safety from this very comprehensive place and it’s possible it’s totally possible to shift but I think it starts with again like I said before coming from the perspective
(46:47) that nothing’s actually wrong you know nothing’s actually wrong thank you thank you so I stopped imagining that I know what is best for anyone a long time ago years ago when I recognized that you’re not ready till you’re ready maybe you’re never ready and who am I to imagine that I know what’s better or worse all that I know for myself is that when I have this split I called it the source of cognitive dissonance when I have this split inside me whether it’s about eating a certain way taking meds being in a relationship that is fundamentally
(47:26) unhealthy for me whatever it is when I have a big one for me I always talk about that I’m still working with is ordering from Amazon right like I order from Amazon part of me feels entitled and wants to do that and then other part of me is like wow you are participating very actively in like a really problematic field of energy right so there’s a split inside of me all of these little incoherent places are going to be sources of suffering and it’s energetic too right because the more of these we have the more shame we hold and
(47:57) shame it’s like bad breath or something like it people perceive it they feel it and it’s so draining it’s the most costly emotional resonance I think of all so if you would like to live your life without medication and you’re curious about that Adventure but then you’re saying wow I think it’s going to be too hard better stay on them that split is a costly split so that’s why I say when you move in the direction of change and it feels like relief if you choose to join us for this year’s VMR and the moment you click I’m a big
(48:34) believer in the moment you click invest the moment you click pay crazy magic happens right at that moment I’ve invested in dozens and dozens of programs and I know that’s been true for me as well when you walk in the direction of that choice and you click that button and you feel okay doing it amazing stuff is coming but if you were to get around that button and you click it like oh God now I have just do this but it’s not the it’s not the energy right so you’ll know if you play out the wh if the positive wh if we we’re so attuned to the
(49:08) negative wh ifs but you play out the positive wh if and you’re like what if coming off of meds is the beginning of the most amazing adventure in my life what if coming off of meds is how I make contact with what the hell I’m here to do for my life what if coming off of meds is actually what helps me to get clear on my relationship and whether stay or go right those kinds of wh ifs will help you to contextualize yeah what is an initiation that for most people not all comes with tapering these medications I always say that it is very
(49:45) very special folks who find themselves in the terrain of psychiatric medication taper because these are strong humans these are courageous humans and these are powerful people right I call them the canaries and the Coline so the most sensitive to how it is that we are wrongly living we need these Sentinels now more than ever before and we need you like aligned awake and empowered ready to go so I’m really passionate you know about supporting people who feel this call however it is not for everyone and that is totally fine and I will just
(50:23) reiterate that there’s no like tapering during the protocol the protocol is meant to set the foundation for your most successful process there’s not actually tapering during the protocol not to get into the whole psychodynamic lecture about the individuation process however there is this journey home to ourselves right and we don’t know that that’s even what we are set up to do until we begin to have this sort of like rattling in the cage I don’t know what’s happening I feel like maturationally my like 14-year-old has more maturity than
(51:00) most of my 45y old friends I don’t know what’s going on but in my generation it’s like in your 30s 40s where this process where you’re presented an invitation to walk into this space of your becoming and it necessarily involves understanding how it is that you have been projecting aspects of your mother and father all over the world which is to say that you’ve been experiencing Authority outside of yourself in the flavors of your mom and dad and you have been experiencing yourself as helpless and dependent and particularly
(51:44) dependent on approval so that you can Source love and security from these people the resolution of that is to begin to understand that you have choice es I’m always just going to come back to the same Mantra so the way I resolve my Victim Consciousness in my health is to understand I have personal responsibility and choices the way I resolve my Victim Consciousness in my romantic partnership is to understand that I have personal responsibility and choices there is a point you can get to and maybe you can get there quickly
(52:19) where it’s like you know what I’m going to honor this impulse I’m going to be right like in polarity with myself I am going to be my own good husband I am going to be that strong energy that says baby I got you what are we doing and you’re G to say if you want to do this we’re gonna do it and you’re literally going to take your focus off of everyone and everything else and put it on you that’s part of why this program is not free because the investment is necessary to vectorize your attention you’re doing this thing you’re putting your attention
(52:58) on yourself so it’s not as relevant what everybody else thinks and if you’re doing something like this from the energy of this is the good thing to do this is what a good person does why are you bad people not doing this with me it’s not going to work if you’re doing this from the energy of I actually think I might be ready to start to learn how to love myself and care about myself so that I can live in a world of love and care right then it’s like inspirational to other people and they become curious so you
(53:34) know so many people who finish the protocol and the same in my private practice they would be like oh I have to get everybody to do this I got to get everybody no you don’t have to get anyone to don’t even try please don’t get anyone to do this right just model it just be it just own your choice just love on your yes that much that people are going to wonder you know just f focus on yourself bring the attention back inside stay in your business is is what it took me a long time to to learn so if you’re just doing a diet if
(54:07) you’re just doing a meditation if you’re just doing a detox methodology you can definitely you know appreciate a lot of yield and gains but when you do this 360 plus marinating honestly in the brainwashing that I am specially qualified to deliver to you all in this group field of people who believe that there are possibilities that they were never told you know existed I’m just going to quickly because I see this all the time and I tell myself this kind of thing too Erin is saying I’m a difficult case what works for others doesn’t work for
(54:42) me and I would just say that if you want that to be true it will be true and I have struggled with I call it terminal uniqueness it’s part of my mology where I feel so different sometimes from other people that I can’t imagine anybody could empathize with my particular struggles and I convinced myself that what others experience like just won’t translate like into my reality because I’m that different I actually think this kind of differentness like this feeling of being like alien like an outsider like not belonging is part of that
(55:25) foundational childhood like rejection for our vital force Essence that we experienced how could you ever feel that there’s hope for you that you’re like other people that things are going to work out right if you are raised to believe something’s fundamentally wrong with me everything that I do is from a place of Badness and like I only get love when I’m good okay so while you feel unique it’s like in your uniqueness like I’m sure so many people can relate so like how unique are you really and what I would say is that
(55:58) you’re not ready to change until you’re ready because there are ways that we get our needs met by our struggle Shust me take it from me now I understand I like laugh at myself I’m like wow I must really love this like Kink that I’m in you know we get our needs met through our struggle think about it right if you are chronically ill or you’re chronically struggling you don’t have to learn how to say no because your illness does it for you right no I can’t go to that thing no I can’t do this thing no I can’t expand my business no I can’t work
(56:26) on my relationship no I no and you actually don’t have to ask for what you want which is one of the harder things most of us will ever learn as adults is asking for what we want so you don’t have to ask for what you want because there is buil in compassion sometimes pity sometimes empathy and caretaking especially if you have regular Health Care Providers right so it’s built in a lot of our you know basic needs and then even our our need for belonging right like when you have a diagnosis I’m not saying you’re dealing with this but like
(56:55) when you have a diagnosis you belong to the people who have that diagnosis it’s like a club so there comes a point where the meeting of those needs through that approach feels more and more like empty right and that is often when people seek out another way right like hence the burgeoning field of Health Reclamation and so-called alternative medicine and it means that you’re ready to meet your your needs more directly you’re ready to learn what doesn’t work for you how to say no which might for some of you be like how to order at a
(57:31) restaurant and order like a gluten dairy free meal and not feel like you know you’re assaulting your waiter with your neuroticism you know whatever like how how do you live in a world where there are boundaries around your preferences where things don’t work for you and you’re owning that right and then you know it’s also learning to ask for what you want and to grow your capacity to receive it which takes time you know it does take time and I don’t know you know I don’t know if this protocol is going to quote unquote work for you because I
(58:05) don’t even know what working for you means only you know and only you would have a way of knowing I just know that if you feel that little yes honoring that little yes is the beginning of the new story it’s the beginning of the maturation of your inner polarities it’s like you know the king showing up to to put the seat out for the queen but like all inside of yourself and if you don’t honor that impulse right so there are Myriad ways that I have had impulses in my life that I told myself were stupid or embarrassing or like not what a
(58:41) professional does so many ways and then there comes a point where you decide to honor it
