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What if your past doesn’t have to decide your future in love?
In this episode, I sit down with Elitsa Velikova, a family constellation practitioner and therapist to discuss the hot topic of relationships, both moving beyond past relationships and readying yourself for healthy love.
The conversation goes deep into the ways our family of origin and past partners shape how we love today. We talk about what it takes to truly complete old relationships, how mother and father dynamics play out in intimacy, and what it means to turn toward healthy connection as an adult.
You’ll Learn:
- The reason your past relationships and family dynamics don’t have to dictate your future in love
- What happens when you carry unresolved loyalty to your parents into adult partnerships
- The three movements needed to go beyond your mother and stand in your own life
- The link between unfinished endings with ex-partners and struggles in new relationships
- What a good ending with a past partner actually looks like in practice
- The damage of staying entangled with your father and how it shapes intimacy as a woman
- Why gratitude, not forgiveness, is the key to closing old relationship chapters
- What it feels like to embody another’s role in a family constellation and gain unexpected insight
- How unresolved trauma from your lineage can silently repeat in your own relationships
- The shift that happens when you see your parents as resources rather than burdens
Timestamps:
[00:00] Introduction
[06:59] What actually happens in a family constellation field
[16:02] Why your past patterns with parents and partners don’t define your future
[23:13] The three conditions needed to build healthy relationships
[31:01] Saying yes to love means saying yes to endings and death
[36:42] Going beyond the mother and reclaiming her as a resource
[42:18] What completion with an ex-partner really looks like
[52:01] The impact of enmeshment with the father on adult relationships
[57:56] Family constellation as a path to secure love and acceptance