(00:01) so the companion community and program to my new book The reclaimed woman is called reclaimed it is a step-by-step six week approach to love your Shadow embody your feminine gifts and to experience the specific pleasure of who you are if you have followed all the good independent girl rules and you still feel overwhelmed resentful and disappointed you may think that you need to practice or learn or study how to be more soft slow abundant and pleasur L as a feminine woman or you might think that you have to be brave and courageous and
(00:41) finally stand up for what’s yours but the truth is that chasing femininity and fighting for power will just leave you more wired judgmental and disconnected there is a plot twist a big reveal and a hidden path that does not require rose pedals and goddess circles or declaring yourself a queen or learning the tricks of a high value woman you need a huge permission field that can be conferred by other like-minded and hearted women and perhaps my fairy dust to help you remember who you are I want you to imagine what it would be like to feel a
(01:24) rush of Pride as you decline an invitation without a trace of fear or defense iess or to sip your tea as you watch your husband fix the door hinge feeling like the prize who won the prize remembering when you used to think that you needed to show him how to do everything right or to feel the breeze move over your body and a wave of pleasure roll through you opening your eyes wider to the dancing leaves and the light fragrance in the air or to wait in the Carline for your kiddo hear your phone ding with a notification and smile
(02:01) that you’re making 3K while mommying or maybe to feel the charge of a trigger move from your chest down to your stomach letting it swirl until a smile creeps onto your face because you know now exactly what you need to create from this energy or maybe to never be afraid of symptoms or illness again because you know that your body does not make mistakes let me show you how to claim the confidence creativity and pleasure that are already there awaiting the safe conditions to emerge in six weeks this is the only live opportunity where I
(02:44) will personally be offering weekly coaching calls I will see you in there we start July [Music] 8th I’m Dr Kelly bro you may know me as a New York Times bestselling author of a book with an exploding pill on the cover Renegade psychiatrist pul dancer or honorary member of the disinformation Dozen what can I say I’m a born provocator I’ve spent most of my recent life exposing deceptions connecting dots and discovering the secret places my inner victim is still waiting to be liberated and now I feel called to help
(03:25) you reclaim all of your parts your health your sexuality your power and your expression so that you can finally truly own yourself I want to ignite in you that inner knowing and the pulsing Vitality that lives beneath your disempowerment disconnection and resentment so that you can audaciously courageously and playfully alchemize your struggle into the specific pleasure of who you are this is Reclamation radio hi and welcome back to Reclamation radio I am Dr Kelly bro and today I want to talk about the poor bargain so in my new book The reclaimed
(04:10) woman I deconstruct the story of the handless maiden which is I think the greatest heroin’s Journey ever told so in this story there is a father and he unwittingly sells his daughter to the devil for the promise of wealth and an easeful life and of course it’s a metaphor right for what the unattuned underresourced floundering inner masculine does within each of us he betrays our own Spirit he sells our souls for seeming convenience and security and power and the natural consequences of this invite us onto a path and into a journey home to our
(05:00) authentic selves so Clarissa pinkola Estes has a profound interpretation of this story that I referen throughout and she says that a poor bargain is when a woman surrenders her instincts that tell her the right time to say yes and when to say no when she gives up her Insight intuition and other wildish traits then she finds herself in situations that promised gold But ultimately give grief she says it was basically designed this way which of course is my belief as somebody who does not subscribe to victim Consciousness as an empowering
(05:41) worldview and she says the poor bargain like birth and death constitutes a rather utilitarian step off the cliff planned by the self in order to bring a woman deep into her wildness a woman’s initiation begins with the poor bargain she made made long ago while still slumbering that female psychic Slumber is a state approximating somnambulism during it we walk we talk yet we are asleep we love we work but our choices tell the truth about our condition the voluptuous the inquiring the good and incendiary sides of our
(06:21) Natures are not fully sentient so how does this translate for women today I would venture that at some point or another you too have made a poor bargain you make a poor bargain when you play it safe and you subsist on the crumbs of life when you take the bait of a too good to be true situation when you fail to trust that you have always had and always will have what it is that you need to walk your specific path in life the decision-making apparatus that is your personality strikes survival-based Bargains that seem to yield good returns
(07:11) in childhood but those same Bargains cost you dearly later in life and your inner parts stop talking to each other and often one inner protector takes the wheel and decides that social acceptance quick fixes and tolerating or ignoring red flags is worth it and the others are protesting and clamoring in the background so here’s what I see women are bitter resentful overwhelmed numb and disappointed we have a war waging inside of us between our inner masculine energy that is the slave driver the drill sergeant that insists that we must
(07:54) be perceived as good and productive successful and independent and and The Feminine part that wants to Exhale and play and create and enjoy life it’s a mirror for the war that is going on on the outside between men and women feminism I will argue and have has sold us this poor bargain and we took the bait we ate the poison apple we were told that if we serve an employer we’d be free but if we serve our husband we are slaves we were told that if we suppress our female biology with birth control medicalized birth and
(08:33) anti-depressants we’d be empowered we were told that if we use our heads instead of our hearts we’d be respected and we were told that men are the enemy we thought that we wanted freedom but I’m here to say that what we have always wanted is safety safety is ending the war on the inside and also on the outside because it’s Hol fractal it is taking the other as yourself it is resolving judgment it’s owning when your body says no and honoring when your body says yes and resolving self- betrayal and patterns of victimization so that
(09:13) you can experience what I call the specific pleasure of who you are because it turns out that chasing femininity which I see so many women doing right so rose petals and goddess circles and forced self-care that just ends up being another thing on your to-do list and fighting for power which has been my proclivity over the years these efforts do not work so I write in my book a woman’s biology is designed to create and nurture life and so she is the Blooming Bud the flickering Flame the drop of water that yearns for sacred attention
(09:54) protection and containment she is by her very nature vulnerable by allowing ourselves to be colonized by the hegemony of masculine values we have abdicated intimacy with what is valuable to us as women gaslighting ourselves into thinking that achievement success and productivity are the keys to fulfillment all right the feminist movement promised that we would get ours that we would know freedom and power and that we would no longer suffer what it is to be a woman we were promised freedom from our roles in the house
(10:29) household our reproductive imperative and even from the constraints of a female body courtesy of sexual reassignment sexuality was rendered a recreational activity to be infused with whatever meaning you assign it no different from any other social interaction and as we deny the biological reality of a woman’s roles and vulnerabilities we also deny the reality that women happen to live in a world with men and we strike a poor bargain when our sexual freedom is contingent Upon Our sexual appeal which is a very limited game for women to play
(11:05) over the course of our lifetimes a game that denies the root power of a woman’s energetic and erotic gifts whether she’s making love giving a lecture or stirring a pot of soup so if the feminist movement serve to I would argue of course by Design extract us from our primary role as caretakers to render us additional tax s and to capture our children in industrialized training camps called schools so that we could mimic the men that we are fundamentally afraid of there are some important questions we have to ask
(11:46) ourselves right so few quick questions are we really looking to gain status and Power in the marketplace so that we can imitate men like isn’t that the same as dressing up as a monster on Halloween and is safety actually found in a 40 plus Hour Work Week where we are separated from our children neglecting our bodies in competition with our sisters in tension and conflict with our partners so that we can participate in Endless consumerism that promises to help us to feel better about what should feel bad in this lifestyle or does
(12:25) safety stem from restoring connections with our female biology with nature with each other and prioritizing our own erotic energy from the invitation for men to step into their purpose providership and protectorship if the latter is true then perhaps it’s not power over men that we ever wanted it’s the restoration of the truly empowered man so that we can finally exhale and get back to what we do best which is Fe feel create in it and channel so how do we access our deepest truth I want to share something that has
(13:11) really supported me in this long and twisted wild Journey that I come back to time and time again to tap into my inner wisdom alignment and knowing the Divine truth Elixir from Lotus way helps you to illuminate your greatest purpose through the art of self-healing so you use it to unveil your sacred offering and to clarify your expression you attract community and you magnify your powerful presence so this flower essence dissolves the difficulty in telling and speaking your truth this sense of lack of purpose withdrawal
(13:48) patterns inauthenticity veiled intentions secrecy and wanting to run or Abandon Ship when things get hard so imagine tapping into your deepest truth with ease what a gift head to lotus.com and use the code kelly5 for 15% off the link is in show notes for you the freedom to be more like men in the world is like taking a Tylenol for a piece of glass stuck in your foot the root cause of the seeming problem is neglected by this solution the solution in turn destroys the infrastructure of family marriage and motherhood that
(14:29) actually sustain and serve a woman’s personal fulfillment even if she ultimately chooses to work and play in the entrepreneurial realm in a way that can be woven in and through these natural priorities so when a woman’s natural gifts and talents are commodified she becomes someone who offers nurturance creativity and care to strangers for higher rather than to her own husband children and family and the idea that you can follow your mission and your purpose you can prioritize your work and that it won’t cost you anything
(15:05) because you can still be a mom it’s not true in my opinion and work life balance as a woman is a myth and when our priorities are misaligned with our core native Essence as women we start to build resentment and bitterness yes I know in my life when I imagine that doing dishes and cooking and driving my kids around is something that interferes with my productivity as an entrepreneur and there are like more important things that I could be doing with that time I start to think of my life as units of productivity that disconnection results
(15:52) from my own confusion about what matters to me and understanding that cook for my kids that cleaning up after them that driving them around and all of the mundane aspects of being a mother are actually expressions of my desire to serve them why not because I believe in like child Le parenting because that is where my fulfillment lies that is how I learn to love and that is also an opportunity for me to take responsibility for my choices right so like when I occasionally complain about you know cooking cleaning
(16:36) driving and more my daughter will say you’re the mom and I’ll often come back with some sort of defensive like yeah but I’m doing this all by myself or yeah but you can help me and I am reminded because I have raised Sovereign daughters I am reminded that I chose to leave the marriage to their father I chose to also be a career woman I chose to not get remarried I chose to I chose to I chose to I chose to I chose all of the conditions that allow me to be in the position right now of getting in the car to pick up my kids with some sort of
(17:18) disgruntled bitter resentment or hiring somebody else to do it which I have done or I have this choice to get in the car to pick up my kids and to see it as an opportunity to be with these humans that I created and that I adore and who bring me joy right so that reframe is only available when I understand that my fulfillment comes from the proper prioritization of my roles as a woman and I like to tell Tales From The Trenches as a pedigree medical doctor as a New York Times bestseller as a seven figure earner and as a single mom the
(18:01) Fulfillment that I experience the pride that I experience in my life has never been from these accolades I tell the story in the book of when I found out that my first book hit the New York Times list inexplicably honestly and like the cliteral sneeze of excitement like that was like a momentary fleeting experience that had no roots to land in when I have you know achieved any 4.
(18:31) 0 any honor any reward any expression or reflection of My Success it has felt like almost nothing and I am not alone this is a very very common experience from women who have achieved all of the promises of feminist lore you want to know when I feel Pride I feel Pride when I can hold shame and excess humility when I am willing to be wrong and I see the gifts that come from the connection in front of me when I am taking responsibility and owning my heart I feel Pride when I can change my story and survive that and find the Delight on
(19:17) the other side of what I imagined I would die without I feel Pride when I create things with my hands when I am mediocre at things that bring me joy like singing and sewing and dancing and when I create the conditions to play with my daughters so I write in the reclaimed woman empowerment requires that you defy The Reflex that it will cost to much to take the leap away from your old defensive patterns stare in the wanting face of what you’ve been avoiding and choose uncertainty it requires that you grow the capacity to feel the shame that
(19:58) gatekeep this heroic leap this shift defies the illusion that walking in the well-worn grooves of your poor me no fair I hate this story is good enough for your experience as a woman your sovereignty asks for an initiation beyond your worst and deepest fears so you can finally reclaim your human superpower Choice maturing yourself beyond your defensive trauma and victim Consciousness based programming is the heroin’s journey home to your authentic Reclamation of your wildness and the pain of living that disconnected life is what will call you
(20:44) home so here’s how you know if you’ve taken the poor bargain you feel bitter and resentful and maybe even angry at what it has taken and what it takes for you to have and be and do all that you do as a woman and you might look at other women on social media or in your life who are dancing who are generating wealth effortlessly who are mothering who are gardening who are cooking who are working with their hands to create and you might be left with ar resting face but know that your judgment your jealousy and your sense of
(21:30) potential superiority or indignation or righteousness are the invitation home to get in your lane as a woman as a mother as a wife and to reclaim the parts of you that are locked behind this shame wall that has been erected and socially engineered to disconnect you from yourself so I would be delighted to help you wake up from the gas light that says that you should feel happy and fulfilled because you have all of this freedom and empowerment thanks to feminist Liberation and I detail the stepbystep ways to reclaim yourself in the
(22:15) reclaimed woman and the companion program reclaimed because we are not meant to do this work alone in fact the first taste of true safety comes from and through the permission field granted and conferred by other like-minded and hearted women so let’s do this together it’s time
