(00:00) [Music] I’m Dr Kelly Brogan you may know me as a New York Times bestselling author of a book with an exploding pill on the cover Renegade psychiatrist pull dancer or honorary member of the disinformation Dozen what can I say I’m a born provocator I’ve spent most of my recent life exposing deceptions connecting dots and discovering the secret places my inner victim is still waiting to be liberated and now I feel called to help you reclaim all of your parts your health your sexuality your power and your expression so that you can finally
(00:41) truly own yourself I want to ignite in you that inner knowing and the pulsing Vitality that lives beneath your disempowerment disconnection and resentment so that you can audaciously courageously and playfully alchemize your struggle into the specific pleasure of Who You Are this is Reclamation radio hi and welcome back to Reclamation radio I am Dr Kelly Brogan and I am here with the lovely Emily Fletcher she’s founder of Zea meditation I know probably all of you have heard of it interestingly when I met her I was the only one who hadn’t
(01:19) all of my girlfriends are like huge fans of yours and I came on your podcast and had the I mean we had such almost like a psychedelic experience together in that podcast we could tell many tales about the meta you know experience of it but I met you first just as a woman right like just energetically I didn’t know about your work this is pretty typical for me when I show up as a guest and I subsequently bought your program did it and and then had the pleasure of of being in one of your containers again which we’ll talk about and I want to
(01:53) start out with you know just a little bit about you as a woman because you’re which which I don’t normally do I don’t normally do this like oh tell me about yourself thing because I find that to be like a little bit like filler in a podcast like I had three degrees and I’m an expert in many things just let me help people you’re like no what do you about your childhood your story is so fascinating and it’s so relevant to what the experience is of being in your presence because you have a very particular kind of energy and whether I was you know
(02:26) being interviewed by you learning from you like in pedag iCal setting in your in your program or most recently in Miami at one of your events you have a very powerful presence and command and I think a lot of it has to do with you know what you may have cultivated in your time on stage and so I would love to just share with people because it’s such an interesting tidbit about your your history you know a bit about your how you see your heroin’s journey like how you see your trajectory and I know I know you’re you’re kind of in it at the
(03:02) moment so I’m I’m tapping you for this story at a time where it may be hard to zoom out but I’d love to just share a little bit before we dive into you know what’s alive for you now yeah I love that you called it the heroin’s journey because I recently have understood the distinguish between the hero’s journey being external what can we accomplish in the outside world and the heroin’s journey is what can we feel and heal and reclaim in the internal landscape and so it feels like what’s happening right now is this merger is this marriage of this
(03:34) masculine performance this masculine accomplishment which we need to survive and to be successful humans and this uh deep internal feeling and alignment and magnetism and and Reclamation of my arrows for myself and now to and now it feels like they are emerging in a way that is really potent medicine for myself and it feels like what nature is asking me to be the trans of and I think it is that masculine and feminine combination that makes you more magnetic But to answer your question about like why I love teaching so much why I love
(04:08) being on a stage is that I I used to be on Broadway for about 10 years and it’s what I wanted to do since I was a little girl like I think fourth grade I saw my first Broadway show weeping tears just knowing that this is what I was going to do with my life and got to New York moved here when I was 21 3 weeks later um September 11th happened and but I had luckily already booked a show so I I got my show that my first job was a national tour and it played Radio City Music Hall so I was gone when September no I was
(04:39) here when September 11 happened but I was gone when Broadway shut down so anyway this is a long and winding Tale But 10 years of singing and dancing and acting on Broadway but three weeks after my Broadway debut was the saddest I had ever been and so I had the great gift of learning at 22 years old that I was more interested in the Happ happiness of pursuit then I was the pursuit of happiness right because I’ve been very much in this idea of I’ll be happy when I’ll be happy when I’ll be happy when right which we’re very masculine right
(05:09) like the chase the capture it’s it’s a drive that you’re referencing for many of us women we’re inculturated around that and and I was my lineage like my the women in my family are the Breadwinners they are the primary caretakers and I used to think that that was masculine but now I’m learning that that might be the wounded feminine where it’s this like overcompensating this overh holding that turns into Mar or brittleness and so that is the thing I am working very oh no let’s let’s re let’s be clear about my
(05:37) words I’m working so hard to soften which is true and then I catch myself and I’m like butter Emily imagine your nervous system is like butter and I’m like how much fun can I have through this death portal um so anyway long story short I spent 10 years on Broadway thinking I’ll be happy when I’ll be happy when and then finally I learned to meditate and this particular style of meditation cured my insomnia on the first day I’ve been suffering from debilitating insomnia for 18 months I was going gray at 27 I was getting sick I was getting
(06:11) injured and I was very confused why I was living my dream and miserable you know I’ve done the external thing right like I did I got it and so I learned to meditate and it was the first time I was like oh I’m not a Seeker anymore I found it I the thing I was looking for actually is inside of me turn turn out that the kingdom Heaven is within turn out room was right like what you seek is in you but it wasn’t until I learned meditation that I was able to have that visceral experience for myself because it’s one thing to know that
(06:40) intellectually it’s very different to experience that viscerally and so then I learned meditation and I was like wait a minute why isn’t everyone doing this that’s not just the name of my podcast like it’s genuinely when I find something that works I’m like like I can’t help but you know shout it from the rooftop so left Broadway went to India trained for three years to be a teacher and then started Zea meditation which is the name of my company and have been teaching ever since I’ve taught over like 60,000 people now and and when I say taught I
(07:09) mean like 60,000 people have a daily meditation practice that they do twice a day on their own like as a direct result of my teachings which I feel really really proud of and we made the world’s first online meditation training back in 2013 so like as a Broadway showgirl they like tap danced for a living to like make the world’s first online meditation training I also feel really proud of and then it got like even that got kind of masculine like I used to joke that I was like the world’s most competitive meditation
(07:39) teacher which yes you can make meditation competitive and I was just you know like using all these skills that I had from Broadway and sort of being this bridge between science and spirit and teaching at Google and Harvard and apple and and it was all amazing and I was married and had a child and had a multi- figure business and I was like living the dream and then 2020 happened and the whole world shifted and I feel like what happened in 2020 I mean a lot of things happened but one of the things that I felt the most was this shift from this
(08:11) hyper masculine externally focused Society into one of more like what are my priorities what is important to me more more alignment more magnetism more time in nature like so many of my friends are like I want to be in nature I want to be in nature I like eight friends starting communes and Farms in Costa Rica so it just felt like everybody got the same message at the same time and it was like more time in nature more alignment with your time and your priorities which feels more feminine right it’s more of like an
(08:40) internal checking in versus how many zeros in the bank account so I was no exception my focus start to go internal I went through a divorce and three weeks later nature started like fire hosing me with this PhD in sacred sexuality I met Lea Martin who’s now my best friend I met this beautiful Cosmic Love named Adam I moved in with Regina Tomas AKA mama Gina and we have lived together in amazing Bliss for the last four years and so it just felt like I kept getting all these initiations all these gifts all these tools which was a lovely a
(09:13) lovely thing to receive for me personally but it felt like it was bigger than that nature was like Hey you know that thing you did for meditation you know how you help to make it accessible and attractive to a mainstream audience well now we need you to do that for these even more potent and even more taboo tools because the world is getting more intense the world I would argue is getting more filled with fear and sickness and and separation and I really believe that the only antidote to fear is love and as cheesy as that might sound and as Miss
(09:40) America as that might sound I was in fact Florida’s Junior Miss in 1997 so I feel like I have the right to say that that the more fear we have on the planet the more love we need to bring and so it so I’ve been spending the past four years birthing refining researching developing this new modality and I think this is the first podcast I’m ever mentioning the name on but so there’s new modalities being birthed and it’s called Zea magic and while I used to really judge magic and I used to really judge Miracles I have since changed my tune
(10:11) and I really believe in the Einstein quote that you can either live your life like like everything is a miracle or nothing is I mean I’m that’s not a direct quote but I think it’s the other way around he probably didn’t it either so you think he probably it any so I’m just choosing to believe that life is magical and turns out that the more that I believe that the more magic happens in my life and so what I’ve been doing is basically taking embodied manifesting tools and combining it with meditation and teaching people
(10:40) how to visualize alchemize and magnetize the life of their wildest imagination and that sounds really great because it is and it requires all of you you know I’m learning that like if you are going to have the audacity to birth something called Magic you’re going to have to be willing to surrender anything in your life that isn’t almost anything in your life that is not in fact magic and so like while I’m I’m saying this because if I’m talking to the skeptic in me five years ago I would just want to hear that like
(11:14) oh it’s also work do you know what I mean like you know yes it’s magical but there is also a level of work that is required of you to vibrate at the frequency of magic so there’s my sort of esoteric and hippie dippy story I love it and you know we were chatting a bit before we started the trajectory that I’ve been on even just professionally is so similar right so this this focus on the discipline associated with lifestyle medicine and the initiation therein you know like when you show up for yourself there is this whether you want
(11:50) to call it you know paternal or I like to call it self- husbanding there is an energy that says I’ve got you I’m here finally right like can start to Exhale and it comes from the commitment and the exercising of discipline I heard um from Marian Woodman uh when one of her books she’s a youngian analyst and she talks about the Apparently etymology of discipline is the Gaze of the teacher that loves you and you know that’s it that’s why I love discipline that’s why discipline has change the course of my own embodiment trajectory and there
(12:27) comes a point as you referen the even the like competitive meditating vibe there comes a point where that can overstay its its rigid welcome right where where where a focus on the dogmatism of self-care self-commitment and these practices without the I don’t know the engagement of this body as an alchemical vessel it’s like you’re missing out on the real show you came to watch right as a woman and so you know I see your trajectory is so similar to to mine professionally it’s pretty cool I know we’re also like the almost the
(13:03) exact same age and it’s I just when we met I was just like oh actually I think I you came onto my radar right when you were like this word reclamation this word reclamation was coming at the Reclamation radio and the reclaim you hadn’t announced the title of the book yet but I was in the works of making this event called um reclaim and we had like 18,000 people show up and I was like wait who is this woman I would listen to your videos and watch you pole dancing and I was just like yes like she gets it and I was it’s just so fun when
(13:31) you find someone that’s like vibrating at a similar frequency and it felt like we were getting similar downloads at similar times absolutely and even in our interview on your podcast I heard you use the word iros in a way that I hadn’t heard others sort of like bandying it about and so I I want to dive in there and talk a bit about which I I I feel is a shared perspective but how you think about Euros Sexual Energy is it a very specific thing that you activate you know in these more sexualized hedonistic pleasure-based uh erotic experiences do
(14:08) you think of it more generally like how do you even use that word and then how has that concept you know you talked about all of these women you magnetize to your field who are very erotically you know in the classical even conventional sense um erotically oriented but I I know that you use the word even you know in a broader sense love to hear a bit about how you feel it ties in with what you access through meditation even if we bring it back to like this whole conversation of the chapters of our lives and I think so
(14:38) many I mean yes you and I are very I think intense examples of it but I think many people can relate to like pre-2020 or just like their 20s or 30s even early 40s like external like the masculine and to me meditation to some degree is masculine in that you’re bringing your awareness up you’re transcending you’re like going to God there’s an acceptance of what is there’s a discipline of getting your buns to the chair there is the like the structure of the masculine meditation and I think that meditation is a beautiful foundation for any sort
(15:10) of tantric work or erotic work because it creates neuroplasticity because it it creates the ability for the brain to change because the stress you know makes us more rigid so anyway this masculine then coupled with the feminine of going into the body and what am I feeling what are my emotions how does this want to be expressed through my body right now and then when you combine those two the external and the internal the masculine and The Feminine you end up with this polarity you end up with this magnetism
(15:40) and that is actually how I would describe Aros as the force that magnetizes the universe together so just like a lover is attracted to another lover that’s one expression of arrows but that magnetism can be applied to anything and that’s the thing that really lights me up about this work like I’m not looking to be anybody’s t expert I’m not looking to be anyone’s like sex expert to me this Sexual Energy this erotic energy is a tool and a pathway to the Divine and this is what lights me up about this work is that actually the
(16:09) deeper I go into it the more similar I see it to be as meditation because they both can be Transcendent like the modalities that I work in are meditation pleasure and medicine and by medicine I mean like more of the Psychedelic variety and so to me like what they all three have in common is they’re allowing you to die before you die right like in meditation you’re you’re transcending individuality and connecting to totality in sexuality like in orgasmic States in French it’s called liti Mor right The Little Death and when you’re in that
(16:38) post-orgasmic ecstatic Peak State you are not Kelly I am not Emily we just are you get to experience that Unity Consciousness that everythingness and so and then also in some medicine Journeys you can sort of transcend the individuality and connect to something bigger than us and so for me I’m very interested in giving us Windows into to expand it’s like we’re building the muscle of expansion so that when we come back into our sober States like we do all of this stuff for me like from my point of view to get better at
(17:12) life right like we meditate to get better at life we practice and dance with our erotic energy to get better at life we do medicine Journeys to get better at life not for the sake of doing any of it right like if you just do medicine Journeys all the time what is the point if you’re just like dancing around in your arrows all the time and never sharing that joy and that life force energy with anyone else then what is the point if you’re meditating in the cave all the time then what is the point like we are householders right if you’re
(17:36) listening to this podcast on your iPhone you are a householder you’re not a monk and so we’ve been gifted these tools and I think our job is to take them and to turn up the dial on our own Divinity and I would say that that right now is like my big North Star how do I give people the tools to help them turn up the dial on their own Divinity this is such a beautiful phrase and I couldn’t AG more I mean I think what I Came Upon as somebody who Not only was not interested in the role of sex sexuality sexual trauma like just imagine as a
(18:11) psychiatrist I mean that was not relevant because I was so focused in my training on psychopharmacology and you know the these fictitious Concepts like you know neurons and Bubbles moving across these synapses like all of this Mechanical Universe and then in finding myself through my own personal Journey touching upon the shame gated caverns of my own vital force right like seeing that you can get so healthy you can get healthy to a point and there’s no amount in my humble opinion of meditating sungazing you know supplement taking ice
(18:49) bathing there’s no amount of FL medicine even that can bring you to the place of feeling alive on a daily basis and that this aliveness is what we’re after right like it’s not it’s not having a stable mood it’s you know not our symptoms disappearing yes it is that and there is um an experience of a fuller Vitality a fuller aliveness that we perhaps came here to reclaim right like was we came from this and through this Creative Energy we we we incarnated through sex right and and we like forget that we forget the relevance we think it’s just
(19:28) like something we do with our partner when we have one in the bedroom right so like but only if you want to procreate with a child and only male female and only a missionary position and all you know all of these rules yeah so you know what I had the the pleasure of experiencing with you in Miami when you came to a there was like a I guess like a yeah that I was um invited to because of you so gr up uh having noidea you know what to expect and it was so um resonant with everything that I’ve come to Value which is this this concept of
(20:09) working with I would say specifically a female body although there were certainly men and women there as an alchemical vessel like what does that mean so I experienced it I experien it you know through and Came Upon such similar principles through my own Journey so I’d love for you to just talk to the people about what emotional Alchemy means to you because it’s certainly a phrase We Could you know invoke Without Really grounding it in real experience real practice let alone like Real Results like is this something
(20:42) even that is results oriented like how would we know if we’re doing it how would we know if we’re doing it well and I think that’s what you you led a lot of us through um that and more I would say in this experience so let’s just start there like what what is emotional Alchemy to you and why is it something that you’ve come to value as much as you know meditation and and mindfulness first of all it meant so much to me that you showed up that day and it felt such like such an honor to share this experience with you because I know how
(21:09) much work and time and care and thought you’ve put into your own journey and you’ve helped so many people reclaim their bodies and their arrows for themselves so thank you I’ll say that right now as I’m going through a lot of change a move Regina and I are you know not living together I’m going through a breakup I’m leaving New York City like it’s a lot of death right now and I imagine you know all of us have been through challenging times in our life and right now I’m so disinterested in talking to people or having people like
(21:35) try and hold space for me who do not know how and I I used to hate the term hold space but now I kind of know what it means but for people who don’t know how to hold space for themselves I I cannot share with them the intensity of what I’m moving through right now because my nervous system doesn’t feel safe I’m like you’re going to try and fix this you’re going to try and gloss over this you’re going to try and make it better and right now I just want to be witnessed in the grief of of the of the things that are shedding and so
(22:02) right now I’m getting a whole new window into why I love this work so much is because me five years ago would not have been able to hold space for me right now because I would have been like you’re fine how about this have you tried this like I would have just been throwing Solutions versus listening feeling and just allowing someone to be witnessed in the bigness of their feelings and I think that this one skill of like allowing yourself to witness yourself in the bigness of your feelings be it ecstasy or rage or sorrow or whatever is
(22:31) true for you if you can do that for yourself you are going to be a better parent you going to be a better sibling you’re going to be a better child you’re going to be a better partner you’re going to be a better boss like whatever you’re doing in your life if you have the ability to hold space for yourself and then therefore for others people feel safe around you people trust you people will be vulnerable with you and then from that there’s a level of intimacy and trust that is created that I think is what people are desperately
(22:56) missing one of the things that people are desperately missing right now now I’ve been on a journey of maturing my inner masculine and feminine and I’ve needed all of the energetic support I can get I have been using one of my favorite resources which is lotus way flower Elixir Mists and oils I use one called true strength which smells amazing to support my self-containment as a professional and as a mama and wild abundance to support my well wild abundance and I’m a scent girly so the pleasure of these scents is so amazing
(23:32) every single day if you want to customize your sensory and energetic support head to lotus.com and use the code kelly5 for 15% off the link is in show notes for you click on this Emily before you hold your thought because this is I mean to me it is extraordinary that we have arrived at exactly the same conclusion which is that safety I mean you use that word right so the safety that we long for and again I’ll say specifically as women is within our capacity to cultivate and that doesn’t mean you’re an automaton on your own and
(24:04) you got to be like your own Island and like you know be even more self-sufficient than you’ve been programmed to be it simply means that your capacity for emotional self-regulation is the bridge to connection love and intimacy that comes first then again like I I invoke this idea of like what would this devoted husband in for me do for me offer me how would he create the conditions for me to experience that exhale in my system I sort of play you know in the imagining of that and I have recognized that practices like meditation and spin-offs
(24:46) of those these again I would characterize more masculine contemplative Consciousness oriented practices are how you strengthen that container for the access to this inner energetic realm I mean it’s exactly what I’ve come to that has to come first because otherwise we’re expecting other people to offer that to us right so like my my uh teenage daughter uh my eldest is learning how to drive okay and as a single mom there are going to be weeks where she’s practicing with me right like there’s not a m to me this is like
(25:22) a man’s job like what the am I doing Drive I barely know how to do it myself what I have lost my cool on many an occa she’s doing great like she’s a great driver and I we joke because like I’ll be like in the passenger seat like gripping her arm like no no you’re too close to the edge like be careful what are you doing right so I’m like that woman you know in the car with her and to totally disregulated the other day I I actually owned it and I was like listen I am going to do a better job regulating myself in your presence like
(26:00) you’re doing fantastic and I can do better ohen she respond to that what she said she’s like mama you know her her her her dad is super chill right so she’s like mama if he can do it you can do it too meaning like you know you can get there you can get there in the self-regulation department and she also gets you know that it’s like not personal to her but it’s unpleasant for her to like have this experience you know but the vulnerability of being driven I often like point out to married women you know this is where you’ll see how much you
(26:35) are choosing to trust to your man is like how much you can shut up in the passenger seat right and just let him coached me on this because when you were on my podcast I was driving with my ex and we had a whole situation and it was like in hindsight it’s you were like yeah I mean this is a conversation for another time but I was not keeping my mouth shut but it was indicating that like either I did not yet have the tools to regulate my own nervous system and find that safety Within Myself you know or you know there’s other options as
(27:06) well but anyway I love that you were coaching me you’re like I give you a D minus I remember so it’s like a but but that is my so what do I do with that responsibility that I have for my own self-regulation which simply means choosing to be with myself in that moment rather than self- abandoning and imagining that in this instance my daughter has to change something in order for me to feel okay that is the root of dysfunctional parenting right let alone everybody else go to therapy and then I won’t have to go to therapy
(27:35) or everyone else get healthy and then I’ll be fine I’ll feel fine so you have come to understand that there is access that you have to your own inner magic when you can prioritize this relationship to what you’re feeling which is succinctly said as choosing to be with choos to be with but I’d say it’s bigger than that as well not bigger but the thing is if you’re triggered like in that moment in the car with your daughter when you’re having the fight with your partner when your boss is criticizing the project
(28:07) that you spent all weekend working on it’s very challenging to use that moment to be like I’m GNA be with myself I’m GNA really feel these feelings like when like you don’t you don’t train for battle in battle right it’s like you need to get strong Navy Seals are training before they ever go into war and and so similarly like like softening I would say in this day and age to feel your or feeling something that most of us have been explicitly trained out of since the moment we came out of the womb right from the moment we were birthed
(28:37) it’s like sh don’t cry don’t cry you’re fine you’re okay have a bottle have a blankie have an iPad have some booze have some pills but don’t feel have some porn but don’t feel right we’ve been trained explicitly beautifully to not feel our feelings we’ve been shamed out of it we’ve been told that it’s weak it’s going to make you a that it’s going to make you don’t cry like a girl like all of this stuff is programmed into us and we think that our feelings somehow make us weak when nothing could be further from the truth and I think we
(29:08) have been waiting until the the stakes are high and waiting till you’re in that let’s let’s go to the gym let’s get strong let’s get tools and safety and practices to where we can get good at feeling and I would say even more importantly moving those emotions so that when you’re in a death portal so that when someone dies so that when you’re in the breakup you are practiced at breathing you are practice at celebrating and what I have found is that how this relates to arrows and therefore your mag magnetism and Magic
(29:36) is like good luck feeling the full power of your ecstasy if you spent four decades numbing the power of your pain it’s just like it’s not possible so I think to answer your question of like how this all all works I think this the system is really simple and I’m really proud of the Simplicity of it so what I teach in Zeo magic is teach people to visualize alchemize and magnetize so I’m framing all this work as as a manifesting as embodied manifesting right because for years I taught manifesting from the neck up and it
(30:06) works thoughts become things what you put your attention on grows you know we can kind of like think our way and intellect our way into things and muscle our way into a reality that we choose and I just think it’s a lot faster a lot more fun a lot more flowy and easy when you bring your whole body into the equation so what I teach people to do is teach people to visualize like what is it that you would love so we go into meditation we get into coherence we get head heart and HOA all into coherence with each other Regina hates
(30:37) that I use the word HOA but I was like well we’re just we’re talking to different audiences you know I got to be the bridge I’m gonna send them to you right I’m gonna throw the net wide I’m gonna bring him to you in their swag back yeah yeah so head hard Hua coherence what would you love and and fascinatingly I find so many people don’t actually know what they want because if we’ve been divorced from our physical desires and our physical pleasure if you don’t know what you want physically it’s very hard to name what
(31:05) you want for your career or financially or in your partner and so this is another like you know drop in the bucket for your pleasure really matters you being in your body really matters because the more you know what you want physically the more you’re going to be able to claim what you want in your life so once people are clear on one one thing they’d love to manifest they I have them to try that on like get into the five senses reality of it and then we go into the even scarier territory of what if it never comes why hasn’t it
(31:32) come yet is there something wrong with me you know so we go into like the scary dark places of you know why it hasn’t shown up because if if you want it and you’re an energetic match for it you know Law of Attraction would say it’s showing up maybe not how maybe not when but like it should show up so why isn’t it here and then we get an opportunity to go into the sticky bits of like the protector Parts little bit of ifs like the piece of you that’s raging and pissed that it hasn’t shown up the piece of that’s terrified that it may never
(31:59) show up and then we move those so that to me is emotional Alchemy like what is alive and how do I like name it express it and move it through my body and then what I find is that there can be even a kernel of ecstasy in the expression of that feeling because the truth feels good right like expressing something releasing something feels good that’s what most of BDSM is built on it’s like the sensation of pain creates dopamine and pleasure and holding down your feelings is actually the thing that creates discomfort and so having a safe
(32:33) container where the name of the game is like throw the temper tantrum cry like the baby rage punch the pillow like all the things that you’ve been told not to do well here’s a safe space in some great music to just let it effing rip and then we find those little kernels of pleasure in the expression and then we fan those flames and the kernels of ecstasy then become the alchemical force right that pleasure that comes from the EXP expression then alchemis those fears into fuel for the dream so then we’ve got visualize alchemize and then once
(33:06) that Alchemy has cleared the channel then we start to magnetize so I give people tools to start to curate and cultivate what I call creation energy right which is Aeros which is life force which is pleasure um and and it’s the same Force like you were saying that creates a baby it’s the most Divine thing that we can do as a human right is create another human and yet we’ve somehow managed to allow ourselves to be conditioned into thinking that this is wrong that it’s bad that it’s a sin that it’s from the devil when actually I
(33:35) think it is the most holy force that we have been gifted as humans and that’s why I think this P this this work is so potent and that’s why I think that so many of us are getting the call to bring these tools into the Zeitgeist and to take them out of the Shadows because I do think that it’s going to require that potency of medicine and the good news is that Nature’s already installed it inside of us right like we already have access access to these chemicals inside of us so I help people to cultivate and curate their pleasure to increase their
(34:04) magnetism so fun fact and you can totally fact check me on this because nobody loves soft science more than a meditation teacher but I’ve I’ve heard uh that your electromagnetic field of your heart is 5,000 times more powerful than your head so let’s just assume let’s say even if it’s 500 right like even if the number is wrong like it doesn’t really matter it’s it’s larger the electromagnetic field of your heart is stronger than that of your head so imagine just head and heart so if we get our head and our hearts in coherence
(34:39) with each other and pointed towards the same goal there’s power in that now imagine bringing your HOA into the party right imagine turning on the generator of your body turning on the magnet of your body and allowing that erotic force that magnetic force to start to supercharge your dreams and so what we do is we we use this erotic Force Through breath through energy and what we’re doing inside of Zeo magic is just breath and energy and we but we get allow people to access these beautiful ecstatic States and then from that place
(35:09) of safety from that place of magnetism from that place of joy you drop back into the visualization you drop back into the dream and you feel it as if it’s already done and what that does is it allows your body to feel safe inside of the dream because your brain does not know the difference between a real memory and an imagined one and I would argue that if you’re having this desire it is because nature is queuing you like nature wants to make it so and so when this opportunity comes which it will your nervous system will then greet this
(35:39) opportunity like a long lost lover like safety instead of like oh no this is the opportunity that’s going to make or break my career and so the self- sabotage Falls away the deserving power increases and it’s not magic but it does start to feel like magic the way that like the specif of the dreams start to show up like right now I’m moving and I’ve been calling in support like I’m moving to a place I don’t have any friends or family you know with a child like by myself into the suburbs like on paper it’s my worst nightmare and I’ve
(36:11) been uh saying out loud to my coaches to my therapists like what I desire as far as support and on on the eth on the lion gate 88 I got an email from a woman who was like hey I heard you ask for help on your last Bliss activation and like basically verbatim every single line was like everything I’ve been calling in and she wants to bring an ice bath she wants to like come and support me and she’s bringing an ice bath which I was searching for an ice bath at the time that I got the email from her so it was just like fun little magic and then once
(36:42) I find that once you program the filtration device of your brain which you program the reticular activating system which is the filtration device of the brain to look for magic you then use your recency bias and the confirmation bias of the brain to start to prove that magic is real and I feel like we’ve got billions of neurons up here we might as well be using them to prove to ourselves that magic is real versus proving to ourselves that we live in a dystopian Society that’s just going straight into the hell with in a hand basket you know
(37:10) it’s which itself you know is an erotic charge right like take it from you know a career activist it’s very enlivening not to the extent that we are talking about not to the ecstatic range but it is enlivening to be in that negative bias right to be in that mongering sort of like scanning for the perpetrator and what I hear you suggesting which of course I agree with is that you know if we take the the pallet the the menu of emotional energies and we say I want them all like I am not going to you know filter any
(37:51) out then you get to draw from that experience of saying yes to whatever emotions you mentioned right like the rage the fear happen to be present or easily activated and you get to allow those to transmute into this ecstatic wavelength right for lack of a of a better word and from that place in the right conditions you can start to acclimate your body to that level of expansion right because obviously everybody knows you know about the lottery winners who lose all the money right like this concept of havingness
(38:28) this ceiling on the joy the Ecstasy the Bliss so we can actually capacitate you know like I I have written you know similar sentiments like that it’s like we think we want to have these joyful lives and then we have like one moment of ecstasy and we can barely hold it for like literally 10 seconds right so what you’re talking about is which I love is like when the thing comes how much better a receptacle can you be you know to hold what you imagined would accompany the acquisition of the thing right like because otherwise we’re just
(39:06) in this fetishized like disappointment cycle right seeking otherwise it is that I’ll be happy when syndrome and sort of like a addicted to The Angst of not having it which I would argue that stress is the space between where you are and where you think you should be and so that you’re just proliferating that versus this tool these modalities like in the emotional Alchemy in the alchemis you’re practicing Your Capacity to hold space for yourself to hold that pain and that same capacity will be able to hold your pleasure and
(39:39) as you practice that in these safe containers like moving through a course with a community then in life when you get the opportunity when you meet the person or the devastation happens like you have that container that you can hold for yourself and then you trust yourself to be able to receive like you said that joy and like I’m really good for example at making money I have recently learned that I’m not so good at having or growing money and like they different skills yes oh yes I’ve been there Y and so I’m like oh right I have
(40:09) to I have to grow my capacity to have money and to and to let that money grow different skills and so similarly like some people are like oh I’m really good at having feelings like having life experiences but it’s like can you can you hold those can you feel those life experiences and then can you like receive the joy and pleasure that comes from them or integrate lessons like they’re different skills how important do you think it is for us to do this kind of work in group settings versus like on your own I think look I’m a
(40:39) Broadway baby like put me on a stage put me in a group Retreat like you know I love humans I’m an extrovert I’m a double Aries like I love humans I’m an exhibitionist like I mean I literally fantasies of like you know I want to have stadiums filled with people orgasming at the same time holding a shared prayer for the species like I want to activate the sacred and have 100,000 people orgasming in front of the pyramid so like there’s I love a group get manifesting I love a group and I have spent the last four
(41:10) years like working on this modality and and just recently shot an online course because I know that not everyone feels comfortable yet to go on a retreat or to do this work in person that it does for them need to start private it needs to start in a safe environment it needs to start at home and so what we just did is we shot this I’m going to call it a course but it feels so much bigger than that because we had 15 people flying from all around the world like on their own dime just because they wanted to be
(41:35) at the birthing of Zea magic and so we basically created a retreat and then shot it like a documentary and so the thing I’m so excited about is that even the people who who take it from home and they’re doing this Solo in their home they’re going to have a group of people and seeing their trials their tribulations their fears where they started their blocks so that there is a bit of communal element even baked into this online course that people will be probably doing solo unless they’re doing it with a partner or a friend so I think
(42:02) it just depends on what you’re ready for and what feels safe to you I know like so many people are dealing with sexual shame sexual trauma religious trauma and so oftentimes like any sort of like group thing can feel not safe for their nervous system and I think to really have healing you must first have safety so I think it’s just a matter of tuning into like where am I on my journey for me right now yes I want to take this online course I want to learn these tools and then maybe I’ll take a retreat then maybe I’ll go to one of Emily’s
(42:30) crazy activations at the sacred sites but that you know Step One is like safety and learning the tools yourself I had the Good Fortune of learning these tools like in community and you know at my birthday party it’s and and it was a real gift and with people that I felt very safe with and loved very much and I know that not everyone is is that’s not like everyone’s cup of tea yeah I mean I can certainly see you know both perspectives because to take responsibility for your own lived experience is always going to be a
(43:04) solo moment right like you’re referencing in those moments of trigger the idea is not to run and find your like-minded friends so that you can experience the moment the the idea is this is your lived experience own it be with it and that’s you know unto yourself and to have community and group experiences that normalize this approach to life that says every experience of adversity challenge every as I would call it upset is an alchemical opportunity right not only does that really you know pull it’s the drain like I’m like invoking a
(43:49) bathtub analogy or so it starts to drain you know the the victim saturation that we’re all inculturated in immediately right because then there’s like an excitement there’s a curiosity there’s a playfulness there’s a kind of mischievous energy that you bring to bear every time is not going the way you wanted to or your conscious mind says right so this is a completely different way of living and to have that normalize to have other people around you which personally I think is essential to hold you so that you don’t
(44:18) take the bait of collapsing into the familiar so sad I hate this this sucks poor me range of Human Experience which at a certain point just gets tedious like it gets boring and it feels tired right so to yeah it does require I’m curious to know your thoughts on because to me it feels like a fine line of like certainly we don’t want to stay there we don’t want to stay in that victim mentality it’s not even the truth and and it can get so addictive that it just colors your whole reality but where would you draw the line of because one
(44:49) of the things I I love about Z magic that I’m so inspired by with Regina and Lea is like the depth of their like sorrow like they are willing to to go into the gutters but they don’t stay there and so we’ve gotten really good the three of us have holding space for each other like hey can I purge hey can I swamp and we just like barf it out and then and like let the other one barf it out and then magic happens right it’s like but if I don’t let myself go into the victim story and if I don’t let myself feel it and name it and let
(45:18) someone else witness it or even myself sometimes I’ll just do it into my voice note on my phone right but if I don’t barf it out then I’m like REM metabolizing that that unfill feeling so I’m curious what you what your take is on that yeah this is a deep question so I I have been for many years um accused of victim shaming right so like that I could see how I can hold a polarity that says blending with your victim is a problem is a bad thing of course that’s not the full truth right because you I love that you invoke ifs and parts work
(45:50) there is a part that is holding that narrative because it is a Lifeline to the meeting of needs right like if you take that narrative and all the associated feelings and all of the things that are secured because of that narrative right when I I do the same thing with my girlfriends I’ll say like listen I just need to let me complain right like let me vent and I get their full attention right and if I weren’t in this sort of culture you know with my own friends and I was in the dominant narrative that normalizes complaint as a
(46:25) currency of connection there’s so much much that we get there’s so much that we get from that and to just cut that is to deny first of all the existence the validity and the means by which that part has been meeting meets and I I feel like and that why I love these tools that you’re bringing together that catharsis is an extraordinary portal of access to aliveness right because it’s not so much that you’re an know you know this like you’re discharging it’s you’re getting rid of this you’re feeling what aliveness is carrying these different
(47:07) flavors right so that was one of my my you know Cardinal moments was when I was you know in my breakup divorce and I like it was literally like snot coming down my face you know like in grief for weeks on end in a fetal position and I felt like a little bit of good right like because I’m so used to living I had been like so used to living behind a glass wall like in this kind of like automated version of a human woman where I just Coast between you know bitterness irritability and disappointment and you know some degree of basic mom maybe
(47:51) right right so it’s like a narrow band you know from like content to uh like fine I’m fine I’m okay to you know irit irritate it and that level of grief was there was just something delicious about it which was the that aliveness right so the catharsis plays this role and you know I do believe we can we can also dance in a territory where that it’s almost like becomes instantaneous the out over time like I don’t know not that it’s like a linear process or progression but what really made me uh start to play with that idea is when I
(48:30) read um Yolanda Norris Clark’s book portal and she’s been a guest on on here too and she’s an extraordinary birthkeeper I’ll call her and she talks about how yeah like I’ll just use that word that’s how oh is she the woman who has 10 kids yes exactly yeah you introduced me to her she’s fascinating she she’s she’s total Powerhouse and so she’s had these Blissful births in her later experiences and she talks about how like the like moaning and the screaming and all of the catharsis of course that’s modeled for us not not only on you know
(49:05) mainstream TV but then even in in my own births I mean I was like I shut up the entire time and but she talks about how that kind of a discharge and catharsis can almost be a distraction from the deeper internal self presence this is my language you know that is available in these more like languid you know pleasure filled permissive birthing states that are you know she talks about she’s basically silent you know for her later uh births so there’s subtlety like everything and and Nuance here and I think um practicing the catharsis for most of us
(49:48) is the first Contact that we have with I mean I did Osho Dynamic meditation for a year and a half during you know the plem 2020 I would say and um it’s it’s a lot of catharsis right and the catharsis is I mean I would just screaming like literally screaming for 15 minutes and then it all is in preparation for meditation so it’s like you you move all this energy and you feel this body that you’re in with all of its Associated currence and then you’re ready to be still right so it has this this amazing role and I think the practice of
(50:32) it and knowing when to draw on that tool versus when it might actually be a distraction or even a chasing of a certain kind of hit you know um is part of what we we figure out you know as we move along and I think you’re right like that requires a level of Mastery right and for most people not everyone but for most of us we’ve been really good at repressing and I’m fine and don’t worry about me what do you need and and so like just as a step one to be like what am I feeling and to have safety to express that and then yes I think that
(51:07) we move into you know the emotional equivalent of like having a tenth birth right like I certainly would not give the same advice to someone on their 10th birth as I would someone on their first you know they’re like that’s like your 10th iasa sitting versus your first and so I think for most people we just need permission to feel and I would say that after all my iasa silent Retreats and 15 16 years of meditation and like you name breath work like you name it I’ve done it I keep coming back to this outrageously simple
(51:37) truth and it is that feelings are meant for feeling I know feelings are meant for feeling they just want to be witnessed they just want to be seen and then that gets to be the fun game of like does this want to be witness with my best friend does this want to be witness with ninch nails does this want to be witnessed in my voice note does this want to be witnessed you know in community on a retreat or or but like what we cannot afford to do anymore is pretend that we are not feeling pretend that we don’t have bodies pretend that
(52:06) our Sexual Energy is anything other than holy because that is literally killing us and it is time for there not even time for we get to right it’s like when I’m in these erotic spaces I’m just so overwhelmed at the beauty and the Divinity and to me like it feels sacred it feels like church it feels holy to me and that is a thing that lights me up right is like that I I feel a little Evangelical about just letting people know that this is available that it is on the menu that your sexuality could be a pathway to your own Divinity and then
(52:44) people can choose to follow that or not right like but just know that it’s available and then like when I’m in those spaces and I see what feels like the frequency of Heaven on Earth and then I tune into everything is not that on the planet I’m like wait a minute like this could be so much more fun everybody like just so you know like this is available like there’s a couple clicks on the dial where the the charge like you said like that erotic charge that we get from the suffering we could just tune that on the dial into AOS and
(53:16) celebration and Reclamation and so I feel like I am excited about this self-imposed mission that I’ve given myself maybe it’s nature imposed or self composed of at least letting people know that this is available and then they can choose like do I want to continue to create hell on Earth or am I interested in using the internal pharmacology that nature has installed in me to create my own version of Heaven on Earth and what does that look like I love that you are such an extraordinary ambassador of of this this work and and I would add you
(53:50) hold a great container right so like the safety element it is essential and I don’t like I don’t know throw that word around as just like some sort of qualifier for a high integrity experience I it’s it’s literally necessary in order for your body to move the energies in this way and I I think you you have a very special ability to to offer that and um probably is a result of you know this journey that you’ve been on cultivating your own energy and um and your realness so I am so excited for what you’re offering I
(54:26) look forward to to being in your containers myself um in the future and I we have a dream that you and I do an event together and we get like me and you and Kimmy inch and like we just like make a whole week of it let’s do it nothing nothing is more fun for me than women Gathering it’s just the best it is the absolute best as I know as I know you know I’m excited for this program your meditation program I literally was like somewhat self-conscious about my own Pro I was just so high level so professional and oratory skills like
(54:58) it’s yeah I’m here for it h I am blushing cuz I’m such a fan of the way that you articulate you’re such a genius so the fact that you even did Zea online is again so good it’s so good and you you know you’re like oh I’m sure you know all this yes and that’s it’s a spiral path right like circling back to the power of that kind of self-commitment I mean I I will die on the hill that says it is a portal to your own power um so yeah no no no I yeah and that’s self-commitment right so like that’s why these programs matter
(55:32) that’s why like don’t buy a program and don’t do it right like just don’t just don’t do that like make a promise to yourself and keep it because that’s what builds integrity that’s where the magic comes in it’s like it doesn’t almost even it’s like secondary that it happens to be so well produced and amazing because it’s in the act of that self-commitment that you open up you know these these portals of access so um it’s about where your prior PR izing right like you’re prioritizing your Consciousness when you’re doing a meditation program and in
(56:00) this case you’re prioritizing your embodiment and your own orientation towards your feelings I mean it’s right it’s so ridiculous how trite and silly and basic it is and I’ve come to the same conclusion like learning how to I tell my daughters this like learning how to feel feelings is all that matters it’s like literally it’s it it’s really the beginning and the end and it’s so what’s silly to me is how that we would even need a course to help us do that but in a world that we’ve been trained the opposite I do think it’s important
(56:31) that we have models safety tools even silly little like phrases like well purged right like the next time your friend is just like letting it rip instead of trying to fix it or solve it could you just say to them like wow like well purged and just celebrate the release and just having that little tool in your back pocket can help you from trying to like minimize someone else’s pain because it makes you uncomfortable exactly which is basically why I became a doctor yes me too no I’m teaching the world to meditate because I’m very
(57:00) codependent like if everyone else is happy then I can be happy place The Meta The Meta so so good to connect to you women and we obviously make sure everybody has what they need in the show notes and and if I may I’d love to just invite people to this event called Magic maker because it’s gonna be like a time to practice these tools and it’s free and it’s we’re going to move through this formula of visualize alchemize magnetize and this is like our big Global debut of Zea magic so if people are curious they can just go to
(57:35) zeam meditation.com magic and um and I’m just like everything we’ve said feeling your feelings the safety the the science behind this the history behind this we’re going to be covering this all at this free event called Magic maker so I’ll send you a link and and yeah I’m just St stoked so be birthing this baby I’ve been gestating for four years four years is a long time to be pregnant oh yes I get it I get it amazing thank you woman [Music] [Music]
